Chapter 14

I shake my head, stomach turning over as I put it back in my bag and hesitate, even though my heart says to leave it alone. Something inside me is fighting it, and I’m not letting it go as I tilt my head back to let out an exaggerated sigh into the eerie surroundings. My inner stubbornness is grabbing at my soul and begging me to end my agony and reach out to someone I know will help me.

“Just do it!… It can’t be worse than this.” I say it out loud to myself, telling myself off, shaking some sense into me.

Before I pull that card out, I know I have already made my mind up. I’m weakening - my health, my heart, my fight. It’s all been shaky since the day I left that hospital, and I have barely been holding on for months. I am so tired of struggling to fight every day, and the thought of someone else taking control for five little minutes is like a life savour in the stormy sea. Just five minutes of not struggling to survive is all I need. My weary soul demands it.