Chapter 4

Ash's POV

Riley looked shocked. Perhaps she never expected me to receive the message she sent? Nah, that can't be possible. Why else would she send it to my number if she never expected me to receive it?

"Ash…"

"Fuck it, Riley. Three years. We were apart for three years and only now do you fucking apologise? Why? What do you want?" I asked her.

I was finding it hard to control my emotions. There was always something about Riley that made me incapable of sound thoughts. There must be a reason why she was doing this to me. To tempt me? To relive the memories I tried so fucking hard to lock away? 

"I know. I know okay? I was drunk." She said to me,

"Drunk?"

"Yes. I never would have done that if I wasn't drunk." She said to me,

I laughed. She was fucking drunk when she texted me? Drunk? I don't know if it hurt that she had to depend on liquid courage to text me or the fact that she did it after three years. Three years in which I tried my very best not to think about her. And maybe that's why I became more annoyed.

"Why are you laughing?" She asked me with a frown on her face.

"That's because after three fucking years, you were only able to apologise to me with liquid courage. And here I was thinking you were better than that." I said to her,

"What do you mean?" She asked me.

"Tell me, were you unable to get some other guy to fuck you? Is that why you apologised?"

"Ash."

"Don't you dare Ash me. We both know the only reason why you would send me a message like that is because you could not find someone else to warm your sheets." I said to her,

I saw her shaking her head at the bartender when he tried approaching her. I don't know why and I frankly don't care why she would do so.

"Is this what you've become?" She asked me.

I frowned. "What?"

"You sound so bitter. Were you that mad that I had to resort to someone else just so I could get what I wanted in bed?" She asked me.

I laughed again. "That's funny, Riley because if you are you to date with the news, you'll find out that I am no longer the man you knew and if you were fucking patient with me then maybe you would be having a piece of me." 

"A piece?" She asked me.

"I could spare you an orgasm."

"How big is your fucking ego? And what the fuck is wrong with you? This is not…"

"The me you know? That's because I changed, Riley. I fucking did and I'm not going to let you or anyone else use me. Never again." I said to her,

Riley looked shocked. It was obvious this wasn't the me she knew. If only she knew that I was just hiding behind a facade. I was trying to show how her being around me was repulsive to me but perhaps I was just showing her how she affected me instead.

Riley took in the now crowded bar. "We can continue this here or we can do this somewhere else. Either way, it's not my reputation on the line." She said in a calm voice.

I scoffed. "Is that your weak attempt at getting me to go with you?"

"No…why would you even think that?" She asked me.

"I don't know…did you hear yourself talking just now? It sounded like you wanted to get me in bed. But newsflash Riley, I'm not interested. Delete my number just like you deleted me from my life." I said to her as I walked out of the club and into my car.

"Fuck."

I came here for some alone time. I came here to get some drinks in my system and perhaps get a girl to go home with me but instead, I walked into my ex. My ex who was still sexy as hell and made me hard instantly. She may have looked like trash but it did nothing to the sex appeal she oozed. Why was she more beautiful? Why did she look hotter than she did when we were dating and why did I want to hug her when I saw how tired and frustrated she looked?

I'm not in love with her anymore. I'm not supposed to be feeling things for her anymore. I'm better than I was when we were together. So why? Why?

I pounded my steering wheel like it would do anything to relieve the series of emotions I was feeling. And yes, you guessed it right. It did nothing. So I drove to the one place I knew I would be accepted even at this time of the night.

I walked into the gym with just my suit jacket off and put on a boxing glove. Van, one of my closest friends who was also a coach and owner of the gym approached me.

"Ash, what the fuck man?"

I ignored him and went straight for a punching bag. I tried to make everything I was feeling come out through the punches. I knew my hand would be sore the next day but I could care less. I hated that I was feeling like this. I hated everything about today.

I punched. Hit. Anything I could do while I ignored my friend who stood in a corner. And while this wouldn't be an ideal place to come to especially because this person was dating Riley's best friend, I needed it. I could care less if he was rolling in the sheets with Rain. I could care less if he was a traitor. I just wanted to relieve all the tension I was feeling. I wanted to punch and hit until I was no longer feeling tense.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

"Hey, buddy, that's enough. You'll hurt your hands." Van said as he tried to stop me but I wasn't having it.

"I don't see how that's your fucking business. Just go to your girlfriend." I said to him,

"This again? I thought we were past this?"

"Past? No, there is no fucking way I can forgive you for dating the best friend of someone who hurt me." I said to him,

"You know very well I started dating Rain before you and Riley broke up. And why the fuck are you bringing this up again?" He asked me.

"I don't know, maybe because I'm hurt?" I asked him.

Van sighed but made sure he dragged me away from the punching bag before saying to me.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? This is not about me and Rain. What happened?" 

If there was one person who could see through my facade, it was Van and perhaps my brother.

"Nothing happened," I said to him,

"Don't give me that bullshit. I know you and I know something happened to have promoted this reaction." He said to me,

I sighed. I wasn't planning on telling anyone but perhaps there was no need to not tell anyone?

"I met Riley today," I said to him,

Van turned to me with eyes widened in surprise.

"What? Why? Where? How?" He asked me.

I chuckled. This was not the reaction I was expecting from him.

"You know the bar Carlos was talking about?" I asked him.

"Yeah?"

"I met her there."

"Oh fuck. I should have known you would visit the bar." Van groaned out.

"What? It shouldn't come as a shock to you."

"That's not the point. Do you know the owner of the bar? Did Carlos tell you?" He asked me.

"Why will I need to know the owner of the bar? Carlos never told me anything either." I said to him,

"Of course. Fucking Carlos."

"Come on. What's wrong? Is the owner a female? Is she hot?" I asked him jokingly.

"She is hot and well…she is your type of woman." He said to me,

I am very interested now. If she would be able to get my mind off Riley then I was in for it.

"Who is she? Can I get her number?" I asked him.

"I don't know how you don't see it or how you never saw it," Van said to me as he shook his head.

"What do you mean?"

"Riley owns the fucking place. It's always been her dream to own one and now she has it. I don't know why you don't see it. I'm sure she told you…"

I blocked Van out as my ears rang. No wonder the place looked so fucking familiar. That was why a drink was placed in front of her without her ordering. Why she shook her head when the bartender approached the table? All the signs were in front of me but I wasn't paying attention. How the fuck did I miss this? Everything? How?  

"Ash, are you okay man?" Van asked me.

"Yeah, I just need to go out. I'll.." I'm not sure I finished my sentence but the next thing I knew, I was in my home with a bottle of whiskey.

Fuck me.