Chapter 68. Preparations

I try not to let myself react, just tuck my head down against my chest and keep going, pushing it all away.

I stop thinking about him. Will my brain to focus on the steps I’m taking and hyper-speed up the stairs as soon as I get out of sight. I need to file everything into one little box in my head and focus on doing, not feeling. My emotions are not helping. I have to take from logic to deal with this. I can fall apart later when I’m out of here and miles away. I can break like a dam if that’s what I need to do, wail to my heart’s content, but just not right now. I have to be strong to see this through.

Despite telling myself that, it doesn’t stop a tiny, slight murmur of insane jealousy in the corner of my brain, shouting questions at me anyway. Why was he heading in there now, after days of not? He doesn’t eat with us anymore for some unknown reason, and where was he with her? They didn’t look like they just bumped into each other. She was following him into the mess