Chapter 86. My Fault

I didn’t know where else to go. A hollow ache in my chest unrelated to the wind’s bite made my search seem desperate.

I still had the letter in my pocket, a little square of folded paper that I had read at least twenty times. The paper felt soft at the edges almost like fabric from all the times I had folded and unfolded it. I kept one hand deep in my coat pocket, my fingers curling around that letter as if it were the only thing that could keep me warm even though my gloves were thin and useless against the cold.

He wasn’t in school and I remembered that I had first glanced there, glancing through the packed hallways in between classes in the hopes of catching a glimpse of his dark hair or the well-known line of his shoulders.

I checked but he wasn’t in the cafeteria for lunch which he usually avoided. In the back parking lot where he occasionally lingered leaning against his car.

I even waited after the last bell, my boots crunching on the salted ice. There