Chapter 43

Meeting Again

I lay Clarence to bed as he fell asleep. I stroked his hair, the grain of tears I had been trying to hold back had gradually formed in the corner of my eyes.

I have tried to throw him out of my head. But he kept coming every time I looked at Clarence. Allysa was right; he looked like Lawrence.

I shook my head. Why can’t he be removed from my mind? What is wrong? I traveled far for the good of everyone, but why do I feel haunted by the past? Even those sweet good moments we had are now turned into a knife that kills my already broken heart. I smiled bitterly, trying to dig into which part it still hurt.

I shook my head again. I’d still have to live with myself, with the wretched memories swirling around in my head. I will never let myself fall like this again. I need to stand up. And I have to do it for Clarence.

Until a faint knock on my door distracts me from my