Chapter 4

In my room, I sit on my bed and take a moment to inhale slowly. Despite my outward frosty reception, I’m shaking inside from her visit. She affects me in ways I’ll never understand, no matter how I try to deny it. The woman knows how to make me feel worthless without trying.

She always pulls the rug out from under me; is that the curse of her being my mother? On some level, that child inside me still wants her to wipe away my pain, unaware she’s the one who causes most of it.

I smart at the thought, and my eyes wander to my closed door.

I know that I dislike who she is, but I don’t hate her. I don’t know if I love her anymore; I don’t know what I feel.

I get up and change into casual clothes, jeans, and a loose top, glad to be out of the confines of a suit. I used to love dressing in my business attire, but it feels stifling and claustrophobic nowadays. My hair, already loose, has grown an inch since I had it cut; it brushes my shoulders constantly with its w