Chapter 54

Bathing helped me not only cleanse my body and get rid of any possible dirty smell, but also purify my mind. I tried to focus on priorities. Eat. Drink. Protect children. Rest. Waiting for everything to be resolved without any deaths to regret. Not letting my heart sink thinking about the idea that they would be gone later. Those little kids. Just contemplating the idea that there would come a time when I would never see Sasha or Mirko again made my vision blurry again. And I hated myself for that, for being so weak and feeling so attached to those kids who had nothing to do with me.

And I hated myself more because, at that moment, I wished I hadn’t gone out to help them when Mirko showed up at my door, but I instantly regretted the idea. Just thinking that Sasha might have gotten sick or Mirko might have been hungry, and—

It took me more than half an hour to get out of the bathtub, but when I did, I didn’t feel numb anymore. The pain in my body had disappeared enough th