Chapter 3

Hidayah stood before her mother, fiddling with her fingers as she thought of multiple things to tell her mother. Despite the fact that she knew her mother would disagree, Hidayah still tried to mold up a lie.

“Ummah, I…” Ummah raised her hand before Hidayah could get the chance to finish her sentence.

“Hidayah, is this the kind of life you chose for yourself? The kind of life no intelligent person would want.”

Hidayah felt the urge to roll her eyes but she knew that would only get her into more trouble. Hidayah scoffed, There she goes with the long, boring lectures again.

“For God’s sake where are you coming from at this time of the night? You really think you can sneak out without me finding out when you know I always check your rooms to make sure everyone is okay before I go to bed. Just look at the time, Hidayah. Look at the time you’re coming back. Not to speak of the way you’re improperly dressed.” Her mother gestured to the tight dress she was wearing.

Hidayah furrowed her brows, already getting so fed up with her mother’s words, but it was wise of her to stay mute.

“I said where are you coming from?” Ummah repeated the question. This time, angrier. Hidayah stuttered, face grimaced.

“Ummah I… Even if I told you where I was going there’s no way you’d allow me to go anywhere…”

“I said where are you coming from? Or do I need to use my hand on you? It’s not something new, I can do that if that’s what you choose.”

Hidayah took a quick glimpse at her angry mother and groaned. “Can you just stop? Why can’t I be free to do whatever I want to do? In my own father’s house? Has anyone ever come to this house and reported me for doing something bad? Or have I ever come home with an unwanted pregnancy or have you ever caught me drinking or smoking?” She paused to hear her mother’s response but nothing came out of Ummah’s mouth, rather she stared at her daughter in awe.

“No, that’s what I guessed. Then get off my back if I’m not causing any trouble for you.” She stormed off, leaving her mother scandalized by her awful words.

Ummah shook her head and sighed. With slow and steady motion, she got to her feet and headed to her room as well. Her heart felt heavy, the tears were threatening to fall but she quickly took deep breaths, disregarding the thoughts away. For one thing, she loved her daughter. Hidayah was her favorite, despite the fact that she disliked Hidayah’s choice of lifestyle.

Ummah settled down gently on the edge of her bed, having a reverie. Could she be the reason behind her daughter’s behavior? When she looked at Hidayah, it felt like she had failed as a mother, as a parent to raise such a stubborn child. Or was it because their father passed away years ago and she couldn’t handle raising them alone? She has failed to be the mother and even the father.

The questions continued flowing in her mind till the water works started without her acknowledging. Ummah believed crying is a way of cleaning the soul, a rebounding with the vulnerable self, a chance to realize what suffering and pain are for her… for her daughters. And she believed crying was the only way she’d feel at ease before she could force herself to sleep; all because of her own child. Just one child!

***

The next morning, she woke up late, almost late for her final exams. In a rush, she got ready and headed to school. After her exams, she stayed back to hang out with her friends in school.

“Like I said last night, Adam is not…”

“Hold it, just hold your thoughts, Yasmeen. I never asked for your opinion concerning Adam. You can’t just start judging my boyfriend without actually getting to know him.” 

Yasmeen chuckled, shaking her head. “You’re already calling him your boyfriend when he hasn’t claimed you yet? Someone that tells other ladies you’re his ‘cousin’? Come on Hidayah, you’re better than this. It’s so surprising that as beautiful, rich and classy as you are, you prefer to actually end up with a guy like him.”

Without wasting time, Yasmeen walked off, leaving Hidayah and their other friend standing in awe as they stared at Yasmeen’s retreating back.

Hidayah scoffed in disbelief. She pointed at herself as she replayed Yasmeen’s words.

“Don’t let her words get to you, Hidayah. Adam is yours, and yours alone.” Her friend took the edge off as she massaged Hidayah’s shoulders.

“Of course he’s mine alone.” She fumed before taking off also.

Later that day, after attending a meeting about their graduation ceremony and after party, she headed home. Stepping foot into the house, she sighted him. Heart racing, she entered the living room as he scanned her from head to toe. He looked at Ummah for confirmation before settling his eyes on her again.

“Good… good evening…” She stuttered, scratching her cheek, nervously. She pouted her lips and turned away when he responded to her shooting daggers.

She looked at his face to his well-fitted uniform that he had on. She had never encountered an Air Force Officer that looked dashing in their uniform like her cousin, Ahmad. He was the kind of handsome that got into her bones, that made chills run down her spine and made her heartbeat rapidly. How could he be that good-looking yet she hated him with all her being? It was a waste of good looks, she declared in her mind.

“Ummah, is this how you let this girl wander around the city? Dress so tight, scarf not even halfway covering her hair? Why am I just knowing about this?” Ahmad asked, disgruntled. 

Ummah heaved a sigh as she shook her head. “You already know your cousin’s behavior, not from today but you’re still asking. Just yesterday night, this girl snuck out and went to a party…”

“Is that so?” He queried, raising his brows at Hidayah who was busy looking between Ummah and him. “Please when are you ever going to be sharp-witted? You think being ignorant or dumb about this is attractive?”

“Hey, don’t ever call me dumb or ignorant again. Ummah warn your nephew, he shouldn’t ever open his mouth to insult me again, else whatever comes out of my mouth next, he will not like it and I won’t have any regrets…”

“Hidayah, enough! That’s enough!” Ummah screeched. Hidayah clasped her lips together, furrowing her brows as she turned her head away. “Get out, now! And you will explain to me who is your mate here later.”

Hidayah walked past him and stormed up the stairs as she murmured curses at him under her breath.

Ummah heaved a sigh before settling her eyes on Ahmad.

“Ummah, it’s okay. I need to get some rest now.” He got off the sofa and walked out of the living room, leaving Ummah feeling uneasy about what Hidayah had said to him.

He entered his room, almost slamming the door out of frustration. He slumped on the beanbag chair in his room. Rubbing his temple, the thoughts came to him all at once. When did Hidayah get so comfortable with talking back at him? Why was she always rude, not even to him alone but to her own mother? It has now reached to the extent that she’d remind him he’s not part of the family? Was that necessary or she couldn’t find any way to hurt his feelings?

He shrugged his shoulders and reminded himself; Ummah is just his late mother’s older sister. Nothing more.

He heaved a sigh, remembering his parents when they passed away in a ghastly car accident. He still found it to be shocking that he survived losing his parents at the same time. It left him in awe that he had to go through that but somehow, he survived. With the help of Ummah when she took him away immediately after his parents passed away when he was only twelve years old.

He cracked a smile thinking of how time has passed. Almost 27 years now and he couldn’t stop being grateful to Ummah and her late husband for everything they have done for him in life. If not because of them, Ahmad knew he would never in his wildest dream hold the position of Wing Commander in the military.

Remembering all the grateful things Hidayah’s mother had done for him, he got off the beanbag chair and headed to the bathroom to take a shower after having a good night's sleep that he had missed for weeks.

***

Days passed by in a blur and Hidayah was already preparing for her graduation. The day she has been waiting for her whole life was here. She was busy shopping for her graduation dinner dress when a call interrupted her thoughts. She fetched the phone from her bag and checked the caller. Heaving a desolate sigh, she returned the phone in her bag and continued shopping. She bought her needs and headed out of the mall with her shopping bags.

Just as she was walking towards the parking lot, to where she parked her car, he stood by her car waiting for her. She slowed down as she scoffed. The audacity that guy has after how he humiliated her in public.

“How did you know I was here?” She asked not anticipating what he had in mind.

Ever since he left her stranded at the club two weeks ago, she has been avoiding him. Or call it testing him to see if he was actually in love with her, and to her, he had proven that he does love her. For him to call her every day even though she has been avoiding him is enough to tell her that he ‘is’ in love with her.

“That’s not important, baby. Why haven’t you been answering my calls? You left me worried for weeks.” Adam spoke softly as he tried to hold her hand but she swatted her hand away and warned shooting daggers at him. “Okay, okay. I understand. I’m truly sorry for the way I treated you, okay? I let my anger go between our relationship. Please, forgive me. I promise I won’t repeat that again.”

His words splashed into her senses as if they were warm water, the type that eases any stress or pain. She stared at him for what seemed like forever. And without hesitation, Hidayah had already forgiven him.

“Promise?” She mouthed, eyes getting watery.

Adam smiled widely and nodded. “I promise, babe. And you should know that I love you with all my heart and you’re the only one I love, okay?”

Not that she really believed his words, she was still grateful that he had to go that far to apologize to her and even confessed his feelings for her.

After they patched things up, Hidayah left him there and headed home to finish getting ready for her convocation and after party the next day.

***

Her family never thought she’d graduate. Heck, she never thought she’d graduate and actually be a civil engineer. Happy wasn’t the word, excited was how she felt to wake up, get ready, go to her school and retrieve her certificate. It wasn’t easy but she did it.

She had taken tons of pictures with her friends, siblings, her mother and so many other well-wishers. Now she was sitting with her family as she thought of how things would have turned out if her father was there.

“Is everything alright?” Nafisa asked when they were back to their seats after the photo session.

Hidayah took her eyes off the blank space and looked at her younger sister. She crept up a smile and nodded. “I just wished he was here… I really miss him.”

Looking at other students with their fathers made the excitement dial down. How she wished her own father was there to see her achievements, tell her that he’s proud of her. Hug her…

She felt Nafisa arms loop around her in a bear hug. “We all miss him, okay? Now don’t cry else you’ll ruin your makeup and you know how much that cost.”

Hidayah laughed a little as they broke the hug.

He approached them, his eyes never left her sight. She was wearing tight denim sky blue jeans and a white top that hugged her upper body, revealing her full body shape. She had taken off her graduation gown and left the hat on which barely covered her hair. He averted his gaze, breathing out aggravatingly and pulled a chair close to Ummah.

Hidayah stole a glance at him. He had his khaki on, looking all ravishing. He had the kind of face that stopped you in your tracks. He must be used to that, she guessed, the sudden pause in a person’s natural expression when they looked his way followed by overcompensating with a nonchalant gaze and a weak smile. Of course the blush that accompanied it was a dead give-away. It didn’t help that he was so modest it made the girls fall for him, yet he was still single, she knew that. He was handsome, quite alright.

Before she could take her eyes off him, he glanced to her side and glared her way when he noticed she was staring at him. She glared back and hissed before she got to her feet. 

“Ummah, I’m heading back to where the students are, I’ll see you guys at home after the party.” Hidayah walked away before Ummah could utter a response.

“Party?” He grunted.

Ummah shook her head and he kept mute, at least after they were back home. And immediately after they arrived home, he followed Ummah to her room.

“C’mon Ummah, why would you allow her to go out in public like that? Have you seen what she was wearing?”

Ummah chuckled as she settled down on her bed. “What do you want me to do, Noor?” She only called him that when she was trying to bribe him or make him calm down and it always worked. “Your cousin is so stubborn. And by Allah I was in my room getting ready when she left for the graduation. You know how I try my best when it comes to this girl, she’s just too stubborn.”

His anger was like a TNT which would explode when carelessly played with. There were so many men there and they had eyes on her, he saw it, yes. They have admired her, maybe tried to approach her or even touched her. That thought alone made him angrier.

“Noor,” Ummah called, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Now that you have transferred here to Abuja, why don’t you discipline her yourself, maybe she will listen to you. She never listens to me. She assumes I’m her mate and talking back at me is something she has grown fond of doing now.” Ahmad stared at Ummah as she went on and on about Hidayah’s behaviors.

Hours later, it was already past 11 pm and Hidayah wasn’t back yet. He paced around the living room as he waited for her arrival but no sign of Hidayah. Ummah sat there on the sofa as she examined him.

“You said they’re having the party at the school hall right?” He asked Nafisa and she nodded, almost choking on her spit. She had never seen him that angry. Heck, that was the first time she was seeing him get so upset about something despite the fact that Hidayah was always upsetting him.

He headed to his room and grabbed his car keys before leaving, not bothering that he was wearing a three quarter trouser. He hopped into his car and zoned out, heading to the party. It took him a very short period of time before he arrived at the schoolboy dint of the way he was speeding.

Right from outside the hall, he could hear the loud sound of the music coming. Without hesitation, he stepped inside and scanned through the hall. And there she was in the middle of the hall, dancing.