Chapter 4. Not Gay

I'm not gay, don't get me wrong. I can't possibly be that kind of person. But the way he kissed me was still playing over and over in my mind, and it was turning me on. Fuck this groin, it's always getting up. He's a man, not a woman.

But it wouldn't listen, so I kept laying my head down, and before I knew it, I drifted off to sleep.

"Wake up,' Someone called out to me,

"Johan.' When I finally opened my eyes, I saw Ava. She continued to yell my name. "Wake up, and tell me where you've been.' I glanced at her as I slowly opened my eyes. I asked, raising my head from the table. 'Has class ended yet?'

"Yes, class has ended, and we are now closed. I've looked all around the school for you.' She whined.

"I'm sorry, where are the others?' I asked, my eyes still closed. I'm still feeling drowsy.

They're all waiting too except for Charlotte at the school gate, and she is looking for you as well?' She murmured this while resting her hands on her hips. I stood up and started. 'All right, Eva, let's go.' I began walking, and she quickly followed.

"Are you alright?' she inquired, her gaze falling on my face.

"I'm OK. Why, do you ask?' I replied, hoping she doesn't notice my stupid crotch still alive.

"Because this is the first time I've seen you like this, you look sad.'

Was I that obvious?

"Sad,' I said, laughing. "No way, I've always been this way, and it's always been this way whenever Charlotte and I got into a fight,' I responded, attempting to disprove her.

"No, I'm not joking. Even if you and Charlotte fought, this is the first time. You don't appear to be like this at all. Yes, you attempt to reconcile your differences with Charlotte. But you don't look like this; you're different, and you appear to have been hurt...'

"Johan,' Charlotte screamed, interrupting Ava.

Charlotte arrived on time. Thank goodness.

I'm not in the mood to answer queries right now. I simply want it to be between me and myself. That's the way it should be.

"I've been looking for you all around, Johan. Where have you been?' she inquired, concerned.

"I'm OK, baby,' I say. Don't worry about me; I was in the canteen and so I had slept off. "I'm sorry, alright.' I drew her close to me and hugged her. I felt good hugging her since I could forget about my difficulties for a moment with her at my side.

"OK, text me next time or call me. So I will know where to look for you. I was concerned about you, Johan,' She mumbled under her breath as she hugged me.

"Don't be,' I said, chuckling. 'It's not like I've been kidnapped or anything, darling; I'm still here.' I mumbled something, and she backed away from me, taking my hand in hers, and we began walking.

"You should have informed me, Ava, that you discovered him.' She muttered.

"I'm sorry, I only spotted him a few minutes before you noticed us,' Ava stated.

"All right, no issue, well, let's go for karaoke,'' she yelled.

"Huh.' I mentioned that at the same time as Ava.

"What was that, you don't like it?' Charlotte was the one who examined.

'I like it, but it's not enjoyable,' Ava explained.

I added. "And totally noisy, my eardrums almost came off the last time I went there.' I groaned.

"That was because you were still a child at the time, this is different and freaking amazing. This is going to be a blast, come on, let's get this party started. Everyone's coming, and Haru is going to be there?' She exclaimed cheerfully.

I got dumbfounded. "Haru?' I grumbled.

She replied. "Yes, he will be there as well.' He came to the last party we went to and he said he'd come to this one as well.' She explained.

Haru, I didn't realize he was also going to be there. Right now, he's the last person I want to see.

Shit!

This is terrible. What kind of luck is this? Does she mean I have to go to karaoke?

Haru is also going to be there.

If I say I'm not going, Charlotte will bug me mercilessly, and if I say I'm going, I will end up meeting Haru.

What the hell should I do now?

I met up with the others, and we all agreed to meet at 9 p.m. And then there was the time when I arrived home. I went straight to my room, avoiding Mom because I knew she was in the kitchen at the time. I lay down on my bed, trying to figure out what I was going to do at the party. I had no idea when the door opened or when I heard my mother's voice. I leapt out of bed and glanced at her.

"Johan, are you all right?' She inquired cheerfully. 'I'm Good, But you startled me so much that I didn't even notice when the door opened,' I explained.

"I'm sorry for scaring you in that way.' She laughed. 'It seemed like you were bothered about something,' she said.

She sat on my bed and continued to stare at me. "I'm not bothered about anything, Mom. I'm just...tired,' I said this while stretching my neck.

"Are you sure? I'm your mother, so I'm familiar with you.' She asked, trying to figure out if I was lying to her.

"Mom, I'm fine. I'm alright. I responded, pretending to smile.

"All right, I have something to tell you. something quite important?' She murmured this while looking down at her hands. What exactly is it that she wants to say that is making her nervous? She appears uncomfortable to me. I'm hoping it's not something dangerous.

'What is it, Mom?' I asked.

"I'm... I'm going out with someone,' she said, still staring at her hands.