Seductive Vibrations. Books 1-4

I walk over and stand in front of the mirror; I look at myself. I am nothing special, not even average. My hair is bright red and hard to miss. Green eyes. I'm slender, yes, but still not perfect. Georgina's arm wraps around me.

“We look amazing, don't we?” She grins. I turn to look at her reflection. Now Georgina is fantastic, with her long legs, blue eyes, auburn hair, and her impressive body, the benefit of going to the gym. Georgina is the woman every man hangs around at clubs and bars, hoping for a chance. I would if I was a guy.

Here I am standing next to her; I have no chance with any guys; she is stunning. I am less than average. I feel worse now than I did before—Max's words flowing through my head. I should have refused and just worn the jeans. He was right.

“Come on. We are going to be late. The taxi has been waiting for us.” She grabs my arm, pulling a little too quickly and hard again. I wobble and nearly fall. I hate heels, hate my birthday, and sometimes hate Georgina for making me go out. Walking downstairs, we climb into the taxi, and my nerves kick in. My stomach flips and worry rises inside me. I have not been out since just after I met Max, a person I want to forget and move on from, yet he always seems to be there. He is the person who destroyed my life so quickly and is the reason why I only ever see faults in myself. The truth is, I have not been the same since Max, I can't. I seem to be stuck in the mind space of being afraid to leave my house, fearful of men. I am afraid of myself, but I have no self-esteem left at all, none; every bit has been ripped away from me.

I will see a cute guy and hope. When they try, I never feel safe; it is like it will take something big to make me feel secure with a guy again. While I kept trying to find who I was, every time I see a bit of self-esteem, his face is there in my mind, ready to steal it away, just like tonight.

“What? Oh yeah. We'll be there in two minutes. Stop complaining.” Georgina's voice snaps me out of my memories; she hangs up the phone turning to face me, smiling.

“Just Liam complaining we are late; you will love it. Honestly, Alena, you will.” Liam is our flatmate. He is into all things tech - gaming, cameras, computers. I don't see the fascination with it all, to be honest. Why waste time sitting there pressing buttons? That is just me, though, maybe because I am not a tech person, and I don’t understand it? Yet so many do. I guess that's another thing Max hated about me, that I saw that as wasting my time. I wasn't interested in any of that. Of course, he was, and he tried forcing me to be.

Liam is nice, though, and he has mousy-blonde hair and green eyes. He is like a brother to me, training to be an electrician at university. As the taxi stops, I look up at the bright lights there, a night club. Of all the places, Georgina picks a night club. My mind is screaming at me to run and fast, to just go home and avoid all this, but with the effort Georgina has put into this, I can't be so cruel. Maybe just an hour? Walking in, the music is loud. That doesn't bother me; it is the mass of people I don't know that worries me, And the fact that I can’t hear if someone is right behind me.

“I invited everyone, so I hired the club just for your party so that you will know everyone.” Georgina smiles, hugging me. I look around. There is no one here I know. Where is Liam? I know him. I can't stop myself laughing at the thought she thinks I know these people. Walking in, people keep coming over. You would expect them to be coming to wish me a happy birthday. Instead, they just smile at me and greet Georgina, some not even noticing me. Walking through the crowd, my eyes spot Liam; finally, I see him. He is standing with someone, no doubt another student from the university.

“Look, Liam is there. Who is that with him?” Georgina walks ahead, reaching them; she stops and hugs the guy. He is big, around 6ft 3”, his arms have tattoos on them, and while I am walking towards them, I feel like I am going super slow while staring at him. Why do I feel such a pull towards this guy I don't even know? My heart is racing, and I feel like there is a magnet drawing me to him, my hair standing up. Georgina's arm is rubbing against his, just like Georgina would do with any hot guy. Reaching them, he turns, and I am frozen. Wow, I can't stop myself staring. Who is he?

“You must be Alena. Happy birthday.” My eyes look up to him; he is big, muscle-wise big. He has tattoos on his neck as well. His smile is so soft and gentle. Why do I feel an urge to touch him? Why do his tattoos make me so weak? I try to smile as my eyes take him in, his beard, tattoos, everything.

“Hi.” Is that all I can think of saying? Hi, and it is weak. I should be more like Georgina, confident and rubbing his arm, making it known I am interested.

“Alena, this is Jackson, my brother.” I look towards Liam. His brother? The difference is massive; Jackson stands around 6ft 3", and his hair is amazing. Why is my hair standing up? I feel like I just walked into a freezer.

“Oh, hey, and thank you.” Finally, words exist in my mouth, I must look like a right fool, but something about him makes me want him. It is making me nervous, and I have not felt this way in ages. I want to touch him. Looking at Georgina I can see it on her face as well. In that case, I have no chance, no chance at all if she is interested. I don't stand a chance. So, I will give up the fight before it even starts. She wins; she gets him. I will just wait for tonight to end.

“Well, let's get a drink first, and tonight you are dancing, Alena.” Georgina drags me to the bar. Jackson watches as we walk off.

“Wow, who would have thought Liam's brother would be so hot? I mean, yeah, okay, Liam isn't bad, but wow, the difference!” She smiles at me. I certainly have no chance; not even in hell would I have a chance.

“He is, yes, good luck.” I give in, just like that. I won't win, and I won't fight for a guy either and clearly, I am not ready. The fact is, I don't get why women fight over a guy. I don't understand how a guy can cheat and, rather than being angry at the guy, the women fight over him like he's a perfect man. I, for one, won't fight to win a guy. Grabbing our drinks, we walk back to Liam and Jackson, and we sit down. I start drinking. I feel so out of place here, like I am in a place full of people who know each other, and I know no one. On the plus side, there is booze, so I will stay for a few hours then go home. No doubt Georgina and Liam will be here all night.

“Come dance.” Georgina grabs me, pulling me up. I so hate dancing. Standing with her, I dance, feeling out of place and watching as guys crowd around us. I seriously hate this, and I feel like I have no space to breathe. I feel unsafe and like I want to run. The song finishes, so I make a run for it, sitting back down at the table. Liam and Jackson are standing near the dance floor. Sitting, I watch as Liam walks onto it, beginning to dance. Georgina grabs Jackson, pulling him on the dance floor, her body all over his. Her hands are grabbing him and stroking his body. I do feel sorry for him, yet at the same time I am laughing inside. I feel for any guy who agrees to dance with Georgina. She is not subtle. If she likes you and you’re dancing with her, you will know and not be able to escape easily.