Chapter 4. The Art of Detachment

ASHER

Because Mommy and Daddy also missed Denzia, and moreover, Mommy thought that it would be easier for Daddy and me to move on if we didn’t remember grandpa and the house where we became very close, they both decided that we should return to Denzia and live there again.

The next few weeks were hectic for us as we sorted out the papers we needed to return to Denzia and live there permanently again. Along with that arrangement, I also dropped out of school, which saddened my countable friends—Ck, Joan, and Laurence.

Ck and Joan were like me, Denzians (born and raised in Denzia), while Laurence was a Zedfinan. I became friends with them because we were quite similar, and we didn’t have much of a language barrier since English was our native language, with just a few different expressions and words specific to Denzia and Zedfina, and that didn’t hinder our communication much.

“We’ll miss you so much, Ash…” Joan said with a frown. She even stood up from her seat in the school canteen just to hug me, and when she did that, Ck and Laurence immediately followed suit. They all cried simultaneously, as if they had lost someone dear to them.

Seeing them like this made me feel special… made me feel like life was treating me really well. I felt this way on my birthday too… when I remembered my previous birthdays in my two past lives. I felt this way because in my two past lives, I didn’t have childhood friends, and I only had two real friends—in my first life, it was Kara and Jackson, and in my second life, it was Kaitlyn and Dylan. And both of those pairs were reincarnations.

But even though this feeling I was experiencing melted my heart, I still didn’t let down the walls in my heart because deep down, I knew and believed that these people were just temporary in my life. I was sure of that because their faces weren’t familiar… and that meant I didn’t know them in my two past lives… or this life was their first. I shouldn’t get attached to them… because if that happens, I’ll be the only one who will suffer because the number of people I’ll struggle to let go of will just increase.

“I’ll miss you too, guys…” I hugged them back. “But don’t be too dramatic because Denzia is just so close here. You can visit me… and I… I can visit you too,” I said. Although a part of me knew that I wouldn’t do the latter because doing so would mean I’d have to keep in contact with them, and if that happened, I’d be the one struggling, as I mentioned.

“Plus, we can make our social media accounts, and there… we could chat with him!” Laurence added. He seemed so hopeful, and I couldn’t help but feel bad. In my two past lives, I also experienced being cut off by people without notice and without reason, so somehow, I knew how they would feel.

After that, they gave me a stuffed toy otter that they chipped in for to buy, and they all had handwritten letters. I didn’t open their letters immediately; I told them I’d do it at home to avoid getting too emotional.

When I got home, I went straight to my room and opened my laptop to create an account on FaceGram, the widely used social media application in Denzia. Since this social media required users to be at least 12 years old, I had to lie about my age.

The reason I made an account was because of Kayleigh. I suddenly remembered Aunt Marie mentioning the other day that her daughter, Kayleigh, already had a FaceGram account, and I could message her there to become ‘friends’ somehow, even just online. And I’m seizing that chance now. Besides, what Aunt Marie said makes sense because nowadays, online friendships are a thing.

After filling out the required information to create a FaceGram account, I quickly created my account and immediately uploaded a picture to use as my profile picture.

Once my FaceGram profile was set up, I immediately searched for Mommy’s and Daddy’s FaceGram profiles, and then I added Aunt Marie and Kayleigh. Kayleigh’s name on FaceGram was Lee Amaris. I had trouble finding her because I initially searched for ‘Kayleigh Amaris’. Luckily, I found her on Auntie’s friends list.

“Do you have homework today, baby?” Mommy asked me as she opened the door to my room after knocking three times.

I nodded eagerly with a smile. “Mommy, I made a FaceGram account…” I informed her. She probably hadn’t seen it yet because she wasn’t very fond of using her cellphone.

Mommy smiled and asked, “Did you add Lee as a friend like your Auntie Marie said?”

I nodded in response. “I also added Auntie. I’m excited for them to be our neighbors!” I said. Mommy probably saw my excitement because my smile reached ear to ear.

“Get dressed, baby, and come downstairs, okay? Dinner is served downstairs…” After that, Mommy closed the door, and I heard her footsteps going downstairs.

Before getting dressed, I decided to leave a message for Lee.

Me: Hi, Lee! I am your mother’s godson… so that technically makes us siblings! Hehe. I’m excited to see you in two days! I have so much to tell you. We’re not super close yet, but I already know we’ll be best friends! :D

After sending that message to Lee, I immediately got dressed. After getting dressed, I remembered the handwritten letters given by Ck, Joan, and Laurence. I took them out of my bag and quickly hid them in the bottom drawer before I was tempted to read them.

That night during dinner, I told Mommy and Daddy about what happened at school earlier and how my friends cried when I told them that I dropped out because we were going back to Denzia to live there, and after I finished my story, Mommy and Daddy shared their memories of Denzia and the places they visited there that they wanted me to see too.

After dinner, I offered to wash the dishes since Mommy and Daddy were busy packing the things we would bring to Denzia. Because I was only seven years old and still small, I had to stand on a small stool just to reach the sink and wash properly.

After washing our dishes, I went back up to my room and started packing the things I would bring to Denzia and leave behind here.

While I was arranging my things, I heard my laptop beep because of a notification, and I saw that it was a friend request from Joan. My laptop beeped again after a second, and it was because of a message from Joan. It was just a simple ‘Hello’.

I stared at my laptop screen for a moment… debating whether I should accept that friend request, but I decided to just ignore it for now.

The next day, when I opened my FaceGram account, I saw that Ck and Laurence had also sent me friend requests, and Laurence even messaged me, asking for my address so they could visit me now that my departure was tomorrow.

I decided to ignore it like I did with Joan’s friend request and message, and instead, I checked my chat with Lee to see if she had seen my message yet, but she hadn’t, so I just frowned and sighed.

But it’s okay. We’re seeing each other tomorrow, anyway.