All My Stars

“If I had to, I could have waited for you for a hundred more lives…”

The winds tossed around, dancing in harmony as she stood there in a field of dandelions, her white, flowy fairycore dress in rhythm with the breeze, as was her coal-black hair complementing the cloudy blue sky. No one could tell her apart, as she looked like an element of nature accentuated by the white dandelions.

The dusky hues of the setting sun contoured her pale olive skin, but despite the mesmerizing scene flashing in front, her doe-light brown orbs were glancing ahead at a distance, pupils dilating and contracting as her ears picked up the sound of horse feet thumping softly against the lush green grass.

An involuntary smile stretched on her tender lips as she watched a white, angelic-looking horse drawing near her with steady and strong movements.

Her heart skipped a beat despite the blurriness of the scene when the horse halted a few steps away from her, and a man in white pants and a black shirt came down. His face was blurry, yet she could decipher the gravity it held, similar to those green-blue, almost steel-looking eyes of his.

He stood near, close enough for her to hear him breathing. The waves of emotion his eyes held made her fumble, yet she gazed into them, almost in a trance. Her hand reflexed to touch his face as she held up her hand, nearly reaching him.

“AYLEEN, AYLEEN!” a shrill voice resonated, breaking her dream of many days.

“God! Ayleen, wake up. One would think you are dead, not asleep,” an annoyingly loud voice yelled, finally tumbling her out of her slumber.

Ayleen yawned and covered her face with the other pillow.

“Ayleen Zamin, I swear to god if you don’t wake up right now I will drag you by your hair to the bathroom and pour ice-cold water on your head,” the threatening voice of Selina Mert rang in her ears.

‘She must really be mad because her threats are never empty,’ Ayleen wondered before finally giving up and getting out of her small yet warm bed.

If looks could kill, she would be fifteen feet under, not just six.

“I am awake! Now stop giving me that look,” Ayleen grumbled before walking to her decent-sized bathroom to freshen up, watching her fit form walking out of her room before hearing her say,

“I will believe it when you are ready!”

Ten minutes later, Ayleen walked towards the small makeshift kitchen in the lounge of their two-room apartment, watching Selina hurriedly pack her clothes for the day while glaring at her.

“Why are you so hell-bent on waking me so early? It’s not like I have much to do besides pondering over my misery-filled break from University,” Ayleen muttered in a gloomy tone before grabbing a carton of milk from the fridge.

Selina rolled her eyes.

“Why are you so pessimistic, Ayleen? You just lost one job; you might get another one, but not with this lazy attitude of yours.”

Ayleen tossed the cereal into the bowl before adding milk, her eyebrows puckered.

“I don’t think I am getting any!” she fretted.

Selina sighed before tugging a lock of her morning hair behind her ear.

“Stop worrying, Ayleen. I know things have been adding up on you, but you will figure it out, just like you have always done. I am here for you!” her hazel-green eyes twinkled as she lectured her.

“I know you are, Selina. I love you!” Ayleen smiled back while eating her breakfast.

“Now that’s like my girl. Now I am running late for work. Grandma is in the neighborhood; she will be back by the evening. The electricity bill and money are by the counter cabinet. Do get it paid, and don’t sulk around all day. I will get burgers for dinner. Now see ya later!”

Selina rushed to grab her bag before running towards the door, munching on a granola bar.

“Love you!” With that, the door closed with a thud, leaving Ayleen chuckling at her friend.

That’s Selina Mert for you: strong, bold, and confident, not to forget the hourglass figure she had that made every guy drool over her. Completely opposite to Ayleen’s shy, timid, uncertain, and chubby personality. Everyone in school called her the goody-two-shoes, though she was always an above-average student who was clumsy and dumb according to her father.

Ayleen sighed, washing the bowl and then placing it back on the rack. Her mind rushed three years back when she came to this urban city of Istanbul.

She was a small-town Pakistani girl with limited resources, her father working as a low-rank government officer with a hand-to-mouth income to support a family of five. In such circumstances, a scholarship from Istanbul was a golden chance to not only achieve her dreams but also to help out her family’s condition.

She remembered being scared and lonely at first, but then Selina Mert was sent as a knight in shining armor for her when she was trying to find cheap accommodation. Though for Ayleen, her working as a stripper didn’t fit well, Selina’s outlook on life, strong personality, and friendliness with her were enough to cast aside all those judgments.

Ayleen was a disciplined medical student, being bullied sometimes but still managing her way through life. Working as a babysitter for a family, making enough income to support herself as well as her family back home, but now all that came downhill with the family baby’s family shifting away and her scholarship expiring.

“Maybe I should just find another job,” her mother Daneen’s sullen voice rang from the other side, making Ayleen sigh for the millionth time today.

Her eyes darted towards the laptop, where she was checking her emails for any response to the resume she sent to different babysitting agencies.

“No, Mom, you are not getting another job. It’s bad enough that you are working already. I don’t want you to tire yourself out. Besides, if you get another job, who would take care of Ammara and Sammara?” Ayleen said as she checked the balance in her bank account. There were around five hundred dollars, which either paid her med school fees or paid her part of the dues for this ramshackle apartment or sent them back home.

“But what are we going to do, Ayleen? We need money for Ammara and Samara’s college fees; the deadline is near, and so is your dad’s retirement. I don’t know if we can pay the fees, and what about his medicines? Then there are the groceries, and the apartment and the electricity, and the—”

“Ammi, Ammi (mom, mom)!” Ayleen interrupted her mother.

“Relax,” she said as Daneen took three deep breaths. “Just relax, okay? I’ll handle it; everything will be fine. I am sure I can find another job that pays well. Just let me handle everything, okay? Trust me on this one. I will take care of it.” Ayleen told her mother, although she had no idea what she was going to do or where she was going to find a job since all the agencies needed a full-time babysitter.

“Ayleen,” her mother muttered after some time.

“Why don’t you visit Ibrahim Khan? I mean, I heard they reside in Istanbul, and besides, he is a distant relative of your father.”

Ayleen’s eyes snapped together at her mother’s incredulous suggestion.

“Ammi, are you even listening to yourself? Ibrahim Khan is not some ordinary person whom I could meet and greet. Khan’s are the second richest family here; they are like celebrities. He hasn’t even looked back at us since moving here, and you want me to visit him for some kind of help,” she jested.

“Ayleen—”

“Ammi, please! I will figure something out and let you know. Don’t worry and take care of yourself and Abba (dad). I will call you later, say salaam (greetings) to all,” with that, she disconnected the call and lay straight on her bed.

Closing her eyes for a second, her mother’s suggestion swirling around in her mind.

‘She wasn’t absolutely wrong; I mean, Khan’s are influential people,’ her mind conceded.

‘Do you want me to visit them out of nowhere and tell, Hey! I am the daughter of your distant cousin whom you haven’t seen in 20 years, will you please help me in getting a job!’ she laughed inwardly at the suggestion.

‘What’s the harm!’ her brain conceded again.

‘I don’t want to tarnish my self-respect in front of these rich snobby people,’ she chided her mind.

‘Is your self-respect worth more than your career and your family?’

And this was enough to jerk open Ayleen’s eyes as she sat straight and went on to type the Khans on the internet, getting any information she could get to reach them.

“Here goes nothing!” she whispered to herself, noting down the address.