Chapter 7

I grew tense.

“I’ve been busy at work,” I argued, more tense than I’d like. My work wasn’t exactly confined to office hours.

She raised her hand to indicate surrender.

“Hey, I get it, alright. I’m not telling you to go back to your old ways either.”

I winced because the truth was I slept with a lot of guys in college. Not because I was attracted to them or even because I wanted to get laid. No, I did it as a form of sex therapy, to prove to myself over and over again that despite everything I knew about myself, I could keep my feelings, reactions, and emotions locked away in a nice little box. That I could be stronger than the memories, the pain, and the nightmares. That I could reclaim my life.

Cass knew more about that time in my life than anyone. And she also knew it wasn’t a topic I wanted to discuss.

“Don’t go there, Cass. Don’t open that jar tonight, please.”