Chapter 189. Having a Fit

I stumbled toward my car, my vision blurry with tears, my legs barely cooperating. My breath came in ragged gasps as the weight of what I had just seen and heard pressed down on my chest like a boulder. 

How could this be real? How? How could I be capable of something so dark? If that was really real, what else had I done? 

I fumbled with my keys, my fingers trembling violently, and finally managed to unlock the door. I collapsed into the driver’s seat, gripping the steering wheel so tightly my knuckles turned white. My mind was a swirling mess of disbelief, anger, and fear. 

The more I tried to convince myself that it was all a lie, the more that awful video replayed in my mind—the rage in my voice, the deadness in my eyes, and Nora’s final moments. I could not escape it. 

I slammed my hands against the steering wheel in frustration, a sob escaping my throat. “Why don’t I remember?” I whispered into my empty car as if an answer was going to be s