Chapter 45

In the bathroom of the house, I found piped water, but despite having electricity, the shower did not work. I wouldn’t have time to see if there was any loose wire, so I took a shower with cold water. The house seemed to be hot, so I didn’t mind the cold jet falling on my skin. The back pain slid out of me like the water. I couldn’t find a loofah, but there was soap.

It was so good to take a shower again that I almost felt grateful for the nonsense of going to the city to find a madman who didn’t say anything that made sense. I rubbed myself and left my skin smooth with the soap foam. I washed my hair, leaving the red strand even more prominent on the clean strands. For the first time in weeks, I felt truly human.

As I dried myself with a face towel—there was no body towel there—I looked at my image in the mirror. Years seemed to have passed. I seemed to be tired. I seemed to be mentally exhausted from asking questions that no one knew how to answer. I seemed to be scare