A Gaze in the Dark

RHIANNON

If anyone had told me I’d be attending my ex-boyfriend’s wedding, sitting way over at the bar and watching the man get the woman of his dreams, who was not me, I would have smacked the person square in the face and left a few bruises.

I know I’m not supposed to be here. Heck, who attends their ex-boyfriend’s wedding after a long, unforgettable history and an almost cruel breakup moment? But yet, here I am, sipping monotonously on a glass of champagne in a large, extravagant wedding hall, watching both bride and groom grin their way throughout the entire event.

All I got from him were casual glances and a small nod of acknowledgment to me being here, like I was doing it for him. He thought I was here because he begged me to attend.

I almost snorted into my drink, the boiling emotions rising to the surface.

He wished.

“You want to reconsider coming here?” Ashley, my forever concerned best friend and current date to this pain-wrenching wedding, asked from beside me, her brows pulled in a frown. Clearly, she wasn’t as ecstatic with the sight of my ex-boyfriend and my sister getting married to each other. “We could go home if you want.”

“I promised Hailey I’d be here for her till the end,” I said in more of a sigh, allowing my gaze to wander. A promise I had made right before I found out the man she was marrying was the same one who’d professed undying love to me. Ashley looked at me like I had messed-up makeup all over my face.

“Relax,” I huffed. “Besides, I have no problem with all of this.”

Wrong!

If I didn’t have a problem, I wouldn’t have been feeling this constant dread rising in my throat every time my eyes caught sight of them together. Like the mere thing was ripping me apart from the inside out.

“You say that, but we both know you’re lying,” Ashley sighed. I didn’t say anything to debunk the statement and asked the bartender for a refill of my glass. Thirteen years was enough time for Ash to know me like the back of her hand. To know my history with Declan James—the man now married to my sister instead of me—was enough to put me at odds with this entire thing.

“I still can’t understand why you even agreed to this,” she frowned even deeper. “I mean, your sister is a selfish b*tch even to consider getting married to a man she knew you were in love with!”

“Ash!” I reprimanded with a hush, glancing around to see that no one had heard her call Hailey a bitch.

Even though the name secretly sat well with me.

“What? I’m telling the honest truth!” she continued, infuriation masking her pretty features. “I mean, she totally broke the sister’s code by marrying a guy you dated, and inviting you to stay till the end of their despicable wedding so she could rub it in your face that she got the man you weren’t able to keep? That’s a freaking sour cherry on top!”

A groan eased from my throat. “Don’t see it that way, Ash. They’re both in love. It’s something Declan and I never had.”

“And you’re happy for them?” she asked. I didn’t reply. I don’t think I even had one. In a different case scenario, I would have blurted a yes without thinking because I cared about Hailey’s happiness. In this scenario, however…

“You can’t even tell me yes,” Ashley grumbled.

“Hailey’s happy. It’s her big day. That’s all that matters.”

Those were the only words I could mumble out. Words second-guessed by my thoughts. I couldn’t stop my mind from revisiting a past I had promised myself not to dig up again. From wondering…if we hadn’t broken up, would it have been me in Hailey’s dress? Twirling in his arms with the sweetest, most ecstatic smile on my face?

I remembered the moment Hailey had introduced him as her fiancé. How overly dramatic it had been. They hadn’t even known each other for more than half a year before deciding to hop on the “happily ever after” boat, and I had dated Declan from high school to college.

The boat never came for either of us.

The worst thing was, they looked good together. I was happy Hailey was getting married to the man she loved, but they were too much of a match made in heaven. Hailey looked like everything he could ever want in a woman. Fit into his arms so perfectly. Even their laughter was a perfect symphony.

And it freaking hurt.

I coughed, dropping my glass. “I think I found some cream donuts out in the hall, and I’m hungry. Watch my drink for me, will you?” I told Ashley, whose scowl only worsened as she watched Declan and Hailey take to the dance floor in a couple’s dance. She glanced me over, and I almost thought, from the look she gave me, that she knew that wasn’t what I was going out for.

“Get me some as well,” she said instead. “I might as well gobble down some food while I’m held prisoner here.”

I snorted, leaving the bar spot and heading outside. It was almost time for the ‘sister’s dance’ Hailey had excitedly planned, but in all dignity, I would rather sit outside under some tree, puffing out hot air from my lungs, than stare at her smiley face and have all sorts of wishes run through me.

And I wished I had brought a boyfriend here so I could prove I was over Declan…that is, if I were.

But just as I tried to sit on a bench outside the hall to breathe, Declan came to stand in front of me, the small smile on his face setting my nerves on edge.

Wasn’t he supposed to be dancing with his bride?

“Hey, Rizzy,” he said.

“I thought we agreed you shouldn’t call me that anymore,” I huffed, allowing my gaze to land anywhere but him.

“Yeah, well…” He hesitated, then gestured to the space beside me. “Can I sit?”

No.

“Do you have to ask?” I responded.

He sat, allowing a tense silence to loom. Why did he follow me out here?

“I’m really grateful. You being here,” he finally said.

“It’s my sister’s big day. Of course I’m supposed to be here.” But I wasn’t mandated to stay through the entire torturous moment.

“Well, that is…” He released a tight breath. “I really do hope things can be okay between us. As in-laws, I mean.”

“Sure will,” I said, feet tapping the floor. Counting down the seconds till he got up from beside me and granted me the space I needed. “If you’re worried about our past, don’t you worry. I’m over it already. You should be, too. I mean, we were not bound to be together from the look of things”—stop talking, Ria—“and besides, I’m dating someone else already, who, by the way, is the perfect definition of husband material for me.”

“Yeah. That’s…good to hear,” he nodded, brows creasing into a frown. If I were stupid, I would think it wasn’t actually ‘good’ to his ears.

“So,” I turned to face him, tamping down the flutter in my stomach that threatened to rise when our eyes met. “Is that all? Because you shouldn’t keep your bride waiting.”

“Sure, sure.” He sprang up almost immediately. “I…uh…will see you inside.”

And with that, he left me to the suffocation of his presence that once dwelt beside me.

I hated this. The way I felt like I was some abandoned cargo no one was interested in. That I couldn’t land a single guy who’d turn the world upside down for me.

I really needed to find myself a boyfriend. And not your usual Tinder dates. A husband material.

I breathed an exasperated sigh, allowing my gaze to casually roam the entire hall as I came to the end of my small breakaway. I didn’t expect it, as my eyes landed on the towering frame of the man stepping right through the entrance, hands in pockets.

His aura was commanding as he strode forward, paying little attention to anyone who seemed in awe of his appearance, as I was. And I wasn’t exaggerating when I said he looked like some meticulously carved Greek god that had stepped right out of a fashion magazine.

My breath caught in my throat when our eyes met. For a split, sizzling second, before he walked into the auditorium.

I didn’t know what it was about him, but my interest was suddenly piqued to know who the tall hunk of a man was.