Chapter 25

“I can’t do that… What if you need me? What if I need you?” I am trying to be honest because I know I’ll need her, yet I still just cannot come out and say the words she needs to hear. I know I should say something, confirm something about how I feel, but at the same time, I don’t want to give her false hope or confuse her too. I want to cling to her.

Sophie is the girl I call or text when I need someone. She’s the one who can keep me up half the night with pointless funny texts about nothing when I need a mood lift. Sophie is the calm in the crazy, the sun in the dark. Even when I met Natasha, Sophie has always been in my life’s foreground.

“You’ve never needed me, and I need to learn to stop needing you. I won’t go back down that route of self-destruction and booze, so you can be happy knowing I’m sorting myself out. I’m trying to be a better person for myself, and I’m trying to find a way to get on in life. I can’t do that if you keep pulling me back to you. If you ca