Chapter 2

During high school, I always strive to pass through this phase. Luckily, I was able to gain awards for my writing skills. My favorite teacher, Mr. Ramirez, guided me into this storytelling path. He told me that a writer should have the talent to grab the reader’s attention so that they can hold on to the story even up to the end.

On the day I got my first award during my first year in high school, I stood shyly in front of the whole school in the auditorium to receive my certificate. I shook the principal’s hand when he congratulated me. Still, I was too focused on leaving the stage that I forgot to grab the certificate in the principal’s hand.

I could hear the audience laugh when the principal called me to get the certificate, and I awkwardly returned to the stage to get it.

However, as soon as I sat down and placed the document beside me, I felt relieved that everyone had moved on to the program until the principal announced dismissal.

I looked for my friends, specifically Trixie, to give her the Taylor Swift CD she was looking for. I thought I could buy her one since she told me she always wanted it, but her dad cut her off from buying anything unnecessary. I had a few dollars in my savings, so I told her I’d buy her one.

It’s always been nice to be part of her group. Be confident walking through the halls, and not everyone can badly judge you for how you look.

They were by the lockers at the back when I saw them in the classroom. I approached them and greeted them hello.

“Trixie, here’s the CD you were looking for.” I gleefully handed.

“Oh, wow. Thanks a lot!” she smiled.

That made me smile even more. I waited for her to invite me over to her sleepover, which I was informed they were having by one of her friends, Ayla, who was standing by her side.

“This shall be part of my collection at home. Really, thanks a lot.” She smiled and walked past me.

I contained my disappointment, and I simply turned around to see her leave with the other two girls, but they stopped at the door. I slowly walked towards them, and Vince was there, blocking their exit.

He moved to the side, but Trixie didn’t continue to walk. Instead, she greeted him.

“Hi, Vince. What are you doing in our room?” she smiled and tucked her hair behind her ears.

Vince didn’t bother to respond and approached me.

“Jillian. You forgot this.” He said, handing over the certificate I forgot at the auditorium.

“Oh! Thank you.” I said.

“Didn’t you say you like eating meat to celebrate your award? Why don’t we eat out later?” he said.

“Oh, yes.” Trixie approached us. “Why don’t we all eat out now?”

I wanted to say yes, but it hit me that I should meet my mom at the hospital. I’d like to tell her about this award.

“Perhaps, next time,” I told them. “I better go home.” I apologetically said, and I grabbed my bag and went out.

At the hospital, I saw my mom on one of the beds in a six-person patient room. She was by the window gazing outside.

“Hi, Mom. I told her.” She smiled the moment she looked at me.

“How are you feeling?” I ask.

“Good.” She smiled. “How’s school?”

I smiled when I showed her the award. “Look, I won first prize in essay writing.”

She smiled and coughed, but she managed to say something. “That’s nice.”

“Have a drink,” I said, offering a cup of water to her.

After she took a gulp, she made herself comfortable in bed. “There are a few bucks with this certificate, which could help with the bills.” I proudly said to her.

I could see she was feeling helpless through her eyes, but I wanted to shrug off that feeling. “You’ll be out of here in no time with me winning prizes to have the best doctors to take care of you,” I said.

She smiled as she held my cheek with her palm. A tear broke out from her eyes, and she said, “I’m going to rest for a bit, my dear.”

“Yes, of course. Mom. I’ll be here for you.”

“No, it’s fine. Josephine will be here in a few minutes.”

“Is she really ok with helping out? Won’t her kids be—”

“Her kids are already grown up. Besides, Josephine and I had been caring for each other ever since. We could be siblings if not best friends.” She assured me.

I smiled at her and kissed her head as she closed her eyes.

I admire the friendship between Mom and Aunt Josephine. They are still friends after many decades. I hope I get to have that kind of friendship. My hope for that kind of relationship had made me long for a company with Trixie.

The next day at school, I was on my way up the stairs when my books fell from my bag. This hand-me-down backpack has run through its course.

While picking up my books and notebooks, I heard Trixie upstairs. I was glad to listen to her and wanted so badly to be part of her circle of friends.

I heard them talking about boys and other girls at school. Seconds later, I heard my name from her mouth.

“And who does Jillian think she is?”

I felt like I needed clarification on her tone. Perhaps I heard wrong.

“The only good about her is getting me the CD.” She continued, and the other girls laughed with her.

“Gosh, can’t she see nobody likes her? How can that award-winning bitch be so ignorant?”

“Yes, she’s so freaking naïve.”

“Why does she always talk to us? I hate the sound of her voice and if she thinks she’s even cute.” Their laughs faded as they walked away from where I was standing.

I saw them laughing at me and my intentions. I wanted to become friends with them, but it seems that hope is no longer evident in my visions.

As I stood there waiting for them to disappear from my view, Vince appeared within my sight. He stopped walking and saw me. He turns his sight on Trixie’s group and then back to me.

I continued the rest of the day as usual, as best I could, until Trixie approached me when our teacher dismissed us.

“Hey, Jillian.” She sweetly said.

“Hi.” I smiled.

“Well, you see. I have plans, and I have a lot of things to do at home. Can you do me a favor and take my cleanup duty today?”

I didn’t want to, but her beseeching attitude and my inner people-pleaser wanted to say yes.

“Jillian.” Called Vince, who was at the door. “Come on. We’ll be late.”

“W-what?” I ask, as I don’t remember having planned this afternoon.

He walks in and grabs my hand. “The English Club is opened.”

I immediately grabbed my bag when he was pulling me. I looked back at Trixie and said, “I’m sorry.”

I don’t know if my ears were playing around, but I think I heard him annoying whisper, “Don’t freaking apologize.”

We walked into an empty room with only tables and chairs for about ten people. “The English Club, you say?”

“Yeah. Mr. Ramirez had opened it up, and it seems like a few joined it the moment he announced it.”

“How come I didn’t hear this?”

“It was posted this morning on the bulletin board. It seems a few people had signed up.”

I nodded. Then, I wanted to tell him why he went to our room and abruptly said I was part of the English Club, which I did not know before.

“What are you playing? Are you simply naïve?” he spoke.

I looked at him in disbelief at what I heard. “What?”

“Can’t you see you’re being looked down and stepped on? Or is your self-worth can’t be found anymore?”

Why is he suddenly angry? I’ve been feeling down lately, and why does he want to bury me deep?

“What are you talking about?”

“You know what I’m talking about. Don’t you have any self-esteem left? Are you not aware that they are not your friends?”

“You talk as if you know everything.”

“I do know everything. Stop making yourself a doormat for people who can’t appreciate you.”

“Mind your own business. It’s none of your concern.”

“It is.” He spoke straightly, meeting my eyes.