Chapter 2. Desperation

“Why are you laughing? I don’t think what I said is funny,” said Aleah in surprise.

“I’m sorry, I suddenly laughed involuntarily,” she said lightly. He didn’t even once show Aleah any guilt. “It’s not that I intend to belittle your decision, Aleah. Not that, really. It’s just that, isn’t your reason for getting married too cliché? As a best friend and someone who has known you for a long time, I want to advise you not to exaggerate your partner like that, Aleah. We never know what will happen in the next few hours. Don’t trust a man too much just because as long as you know him, he becomes a good man. Trust me, Aleah, I have met many temperament men who look so sincere even though they have many women they are dating behind their partners' backs.”

***

“Lucas, there’s something I want to talk to you about,” Aleah hesitated.

“What is it?” Lucas replied, looking busy, enjoying a piece of tiramisu cake and his iced Americano.

“It’s something important.”

“Just speak, dear,” Lucas responded calmly while sipping his cold drink. “Oh, by the way, since our wedding is coming up soon, when will you quit your job? Have you given your resignation letter to your boss at the office? It’s not that I don’t want my wife to have a career, but I have more than enough money to support you, so you don’t need to work. I think after we get married, I want you to stay at home and be a happy wife, taking care of your husband and finding happiness within yourself. I’ll take care of the financial matters; besides, my money won’t run out just to support you after we’re married,” he continued, causing Aleah’s courage to express her thoughts to diminish even more.

Aleah took a deep breath several times and exhaled slowly, finally feeling calm. Then, she mustered up the courage to bring up the topic of conversation.

“My boss mentioned that I’m up for a promotion.”

“Okay, so?”

“I don’t want to quit my job, Luke. I promise to work hard to be a good wife and a career woman.”

For a moment, Lucas was stunned. He set aside his fork next to the cake plate and stopped drinking his iced Americano, clearly losing his appetite after hearing Aleah’s words.

“That’s a good aspiration, but didn’t we already discuss this before, and you agreed to it? So, make your resignation letter as soon as possible because we’re getting married soon,” Lucas asserted, unable to be contradicted any further.

“All this time, I’ve been dreaming of this position, Luke. Can’t you change your mind for me this time? I beg you.” Aleah clasped her hands in front of her face and looked at Lucas with pleading eyes.

She hoped that her pitiful expression would melt Lucas’s heart, and he would be kind to her.

Aleah truly hoped that Lucas could grant her request. However, unfortunately, in the next moment, Aleah’s hope was shattered when she saw Lucas’s face looking at her with cold, sharp eyes.

“No one can truly be both a good wife and a career woman because sacrifices must be made, and the first option always ends up sacrificing the family. My late wife was like that; she chose her career and neglected the family, which is why I won’t allow you to work after we get married. Besides being concerned about your health, I also don’t want our household to be in disarray.”

“But I’m not your late wife, Luke. I believe I can still have a career and fulfill my role as—”

“Enough!” Lucas suddenly interrupted Aleah. “If you’re stubbornly intent on pursuing your never-ending career, then maybe we should never get married.”

After that, without waiting for any further response from Aleah, Lucas stood up and walked away, leaving Aleah stunned in her place.

Damn!

Aleah hated herself for being so easily moved to tears. The long string of rejections from Lucas had wounded her heart, and now her tears flowed uncontrollably, wetting her cheeks.

“So, you don’t understand my feelings, Lucas. Being a manager has been my dream since the beginning of my career. How can I just let go of this opportunity?” Aleah murmured sadly.

***

They say that when a man is angry, don’t pester him by asking about his well-being or whereabouts. What should be done is to remain silent and let him calm down because when men feel calm, they usually return on their own.

However, strangely enough, it had been five days since Lucas hadn’t shown up, and there was no news at all. He disappeared without a trace. Even when Aleah tried to visit his company, a receptionist in the lobby said that Lucas was not there.

“What does this anger mean? Are we really going to end things?” Aleah mumbled, feeling sad and confused because she didn’t know where else to look for Lucas when he was not at home or his office.

Then, with frustration, Aleah sighed heavily and reached for her phone.

“I can’t go on like this. I need clarity about our relationship,” she said determinedly, and then she started dialing Lucas’s number.

Aleah didn’t want to beg Lucas for forgiveness or to plead for him to stay by her side. No, this time, Aleah just wanted to ask whether he wanted their relationship to continue until marriage or not. If it wasn’t going to continue, Aleah wanted to hear the word “breakup” from him to end all this exhausting confusion.

It wasn’t about pleading; it was about seeking answers. But Lucas intentionally ignored Aleah’s phone call. Immediately, Aleah’s shoulders drooped, and a tear began to trickle down her cheek.

“Does this mean I’m no longer valuable to Lucas?”

Painful.

Lucas made Aleah feel so special. He made her feel like she was flying high in the sky, only to be dropped and shattered. Lucas, the heartless man who had discarded Aleah without a word after relentlessly pursuing her.

With faltering steps, Aleah walked out of Lucas’s office. She chose to sit at the bus stop and immerse herself in her thoughts. Sobbing sounds could be heard from Aleah as her tears continued to flow, wetting her cheeks.

“Damn it! Why does everything have to be like this?” she muttered, her head bowed as she covered her face with her hands to hide her crying face. “This is not the ending I hoped for. This situation is too confusing, and… it hurts my heart. Stupid. If I hadn’t argued with Lucas that day, would everything have turned out fine? I’m so frustrated. I don’t want to lose my career, but I also want Lucas. Can’t my life get any worse than this? I’m not sure I can live my life well after today.”