Chapter 3

“Layla, where are you going? I thought I told you that you were going to accompany me to check up on Adam and his wife,” her mom asked, looking at her dressed up for work.

“Mommy... please, I don’t want to go there. I mean, what if I see him, Mommy? You know I can’t take it. I can’t handle it,” she pleaded.

“Layla! It’s been almost five months now. You ought to let go of him and move on.”

“But I have,” she replied.

“No, you have not,” her mom stated. “Because if you did, you would not be complaining right now.” She raised a brow. Layla sighed and went back to her room to change. She came down a few minutes later, and they left. As she drove them to Adam’s house, she murmured some Du’a, praying he wouldn’t be at home. Her heart beat fast at the thought of seeing him. She didn’t wish to ever see him again. He had done so much damage to her poor heart.

Her mother looked at her and chuckled.

“Are you okay?” She asked. Layla glanced at her mom for a brief second and fixed her eyes on the road.

“How can I be okay when his wife hates my guts? I mean, she does not even hide the fact that she hates me!” She spoke, drained.

“He or his wife should be your least problem. What you should think about is what your father told you. The clock will not wait for you. Before you know it, it’s the new year, and you definitely know what will happen if you don’t introduce someone before then.”

Layla bulged her eyes open and looked at her mom for brief seconds. “Mommy? Aren’t you supposed to calm me down? This is not helping.” She panicked as they approached the street where Adam lived with his wife. “I’m just stating a fact, and it’s not like I’m pushing you to do something. Surely one day, someone will be 100% honest with you, and will love you forever, so don’t give up trying to find him. I’m sure he’s looking for you too.”

Layla nodded, not because she was convinced but because she was tired of talking about it. Why can’t she just live a normal life or have her life back? Her life was debris. Her life was completely peaceful and beautiful when she was with Adil. He gave her peace of mind. But the moment Adam stepped into her life, he stepped on it and crushed it into a million pieces without caring about her feelings.

She parked the car in the parking lot, smiling when she didn’t see his car. That meant he wasn’t home. So where could he be? Or has he gone back to Canada? Why are they not living in Canada, where he worked? Why did he choose to live with her in his house? Why didn’t he move to another house?

“Layla.” Mom snapped her fingers. “Aren’t you coming down?” She asked, stepping out of the car.

“It’s okay, Mommy, I will wait...” She swallowed the rest of her words and dropped down when her mom glared at her. She brought out the bag in which her mom had packaged gifts for Kamilah.

Layla followed mom as if she was forced to go in, which she actually was. She rang the doorbell, and a few minutes later, one of Kamilah’s maids opened the door and welcomed them. She went up the stairs and informed her boss.

Kamilah walked down the stairs majestically. She entered the living room with Salam and greeted mommy with a huge grin on her face. Her smile died when her eyes landed on Layla. She knew mommy was her mother, but she didn’t know Layla would have the guts to come to her house.

“Layla, how are you?” Kamilah said, shooting a hot glare at her when mommy’s attention wasn’t there.

“I... I’m fine, Alhamdulillah,” she replied, uneasy. She was smiling a little, a smile with a twist to it, like the smile of a child who is determined not to weep.

Kamilah excused herself and went into the kitchen to make orders. She came out and went upstairs. The maids did as they were ordered. They arranged varieties of snacks and drinks in front of them.

Kamilah came downstairs together with Adam, and her heart leaped to see him. In that instant, her skin became greyed, her mouth hung with lips slightly parted, and her eyes were as wide as they could stretch. She watched them without turning her head, her heart was hammering, but she kept her gait casual with no hint of hesitation. They couldn’t do anything to her since her mother was around. She was glad she came with her. Mommy wanted to send Layla alone, but she later changed her mind and followed her. Her mind flickered back to the table filled with snacks and drinks.

Adam came in with Salam and greeted her mother without giving Layla a glance. Mommy glanced at her to greet him. She let out a faint hiss and greeted him. He pretended as if he wasn’t the one who shattered her heart.

The emotional pain was what she felt whenever she saw him. Emotional pain leaves invisible scars, yet they can be traced by the most gentle of touches. Sometimes, like a cyst, the “wound” must be opened to be healed; other times, a well-meaning person may seek to heal what should be left alone. If it can be ignored and normal happy life resumed, isn’t it kinder to have faith in the natural healing process?

She has never been a person to hold a grudge, instead seeking to understand the motives of another. It didn’t mean there was no scar, only that she needed to have no forgiveness from the other. To forgive him, one must first resent, or at least that was her understanding. Perhaps that was why she healed so slowly. She was not sure. But either way, her life was getting better.

Nobody wanted to hurt her, yet if her pains could be used to help others, she was blessed. Anyhow, perhaps her scars were her road map. Maybe she would be lost without them.

He stood up and excused himself, stealing glances at her. Kamilah glared at him and fixed her gaze back at them. She was so eager for them to leave that she’d question him for staring at Layla. Kamilah was very bad at hiding her feelings.

Mommy looked at her face and shook her head. “Kamilah, we will be leaving now. Layla needs to get to work,” she said, standing.

As if Layla was waiting, she stood up and headed out. Mommy sighed, embarrassed. She handed the gift bag to Kamilah. She squatted a bit and thanked her.