Chapter 9. Hospital

I have experienced loss. I have felt despair, wanting to plunge into the abyss. Embracing a lifeless body to keep it close. The fear was so strong, it crashed into me, causing me to lose my sense of direction in life.

And I don't want that to happen again this time. I know that loss is very real, looming so close. I don't know when my time, my father's time, or even my mother's time will come. I know that clearly, but still... this heart cannot turn away from sadness and brokenness.

I witnessed it vividly, Grandfather Jordy hooked up to various tubes and medical equipment. My tears were spent. My strength was just enough to support my body to keep watching over Grandfather there. In a room that I didn't know when I could approach and touch his wrinkled body.

Mother patted my shoulder as if transferring the same doubt. So that we could both give each other strength. "Grandfather will surely get through this," she said. I smiled weakly, resting part of my head on her