Chapter 2

Don was hunched over as he moved. Even in the distance, I could make out, though barely, his slouchy posture. That wasn’t exhaustion...at least not physically.

I wasn’t too worried about losing him in the autumn darkness because, due to experience, I already knew that he was going to his girlfriend’s place, and I knew the route by heart. Heck, I could even take a shortcut and beat him to the place, but that would defeat the purpose of the stalk. I wanted to just watch him. Feeling like he’d be safer under my gaze and that I could divert any harm that came his way.

Most times, I felt pathetic, longing after someone I definitely would never have, but usually, that feeling washed up on me after I had gotten home. Now, all I wanted was to see him and ensure that he was okay, even though I knew there was nothing I could do if he weren’t. Such was the case today, where he, being out of my reach, was hurting. I wanted to go closer as though by seeing him more clearly, I’d be able to decipher his woes, but I knew when to draw a line. 

Agreed, I had already crossed some lines, but I knew when to draw another one and not cross it. 

The more frequently he visited his girlfriend, the more I envied her. Amelia Rosalés was beautiful. She was in my department—Sociology—and was quite smart. She even ranked ahead of me in GPA, which was something very few people did. I was fifth down the line, and she was third. Impressive. We did talk a lot during class, study sessions, and after tests, but asides from school stuff, we never really hit it further. We were just different people. 

One thing that made her a college sweetheart was her gentle nature. It’s been two years since we started college, and I have never once heard her yell in anger. Not to me, not to anyone. The most upset I saw her was when one of her friends smashed her phone by accident. She cried so hard, her face was hued red, and her friends had to pull her black wavy waist-length hair over her head and tie it in a bun to prevent it from sticking to the sweat and grime. Contrary to how most people would behave, she harbored no ill feelings towards her friend, not even in the present moment of the accident. The entire department contributed to replacing the phone screen despite her protests.

Very much unlike me, who, despite two years of formal social training, still couldn’t string a complete sentence in front of an audience greater than forty-five people, Amelia exhumed confidence. It was no wonder Don was drawn to her, and no wonder she was the only person his age that could tame him.

I could see the light of the apartment complex edging into view, brightening Don’s figure. I slowed my steps to give myself more distance as the light would easily get me spotted if he looked over his shoulder. I watched him enter through the main lobby and went around the building when he was out of sight to the back where Amelia’s room on the fourth floor was. 

It was a huge complex of rooms far more luxurious than I could afford. Amelia must have some interesting financial background, just like every other student in this complex. 

I took my seat under my favorite tree on the moist patch of grass. With any luck, I might catch him pass the windows a couple of times. I put on my earphones to listen to Conor Lewis’ album—Corrosive Lust—and get drowned in the silence of the noise.

***

It had been four hours. Just some minutes past midnight, and Don still hadn’t come out. This was stupid of me. He usually slept over if he stayed this long, and I was sure of it, but I still waited. Usually, by 10 pm, if he wasn’t out, I’d have called it a day and been on my way, but today was different. Maybe it was because so far, he had been passing the window so many times, and I couldn’t leave for fear that I might miss a glimpse I didn’t want to. 

‘Maybe he’d flex his muscles...or take off his shirt.’ my mind was telling me, but he didn’t...or hadn’t so far. After some more minutes passed, I decided that watching Don was not worth risking being harassed. It was an ungodly hour of the night, and if I didn’t make it home now, I might have as well just slept on that grass, and I didn’t appreciate the thought of waking up to anyone’s face and having to explain why a perfectly normal boy like me was asleep outside a luxurious apartment with binoculars in hand.

As I tried to stand up to go, Don came to the window, gesticulating wildly to someone inside. Probably Amelia. I lost myself in his muscles and even took a peek in my binoculars to watch the indents of his muscles, not wanting to miss this rare moment. It was on his close peer that I observed the redness of his face and bulging veins pulsing with boiling blood lining his temples like little worms. They were arguing.

Almost in instinctive reflex, I took off my earphones, hoping to catch some information on what they were arguing about. I could only make out, very faintly, some words and phrases here and there.

“That’s one thing about you! You never allow...” the rest came out as jargoned noises, and I finally gave up. I just watched the dispute progress. Over the period of five minutes, it turned from verbal to physical. I could have sworn they were having a physical fight. I widened my eyes in disbelief. Don would never touch Amelia, would he? I knew he was hot-tempered and sometimes showed signs of acute bipolar behavior, but hitting a girl? I didn’t want to believe he did.

After a few heated seconds, I heard the door slam shut with a loud bang, with Amelia screeching pleadingly for Don to come back. If I heard it in this intensity from at least seventy feet, I couldn’t even begin to empathize with Amelia’s next-door neighbors. One thing was sure. At that current point in time, no one on the floor directly below and the apartments on her sides was asleep. Shortly after, when I was sure that Don was a trail-worthy distance away from the house, I took my bag and went after him. 

Usually, since his house was on the street before mine, he entered his street and would have gotten to his hostel before I passed his street over to mine. This time, however, he continued, passing his street and mine and continuing downtown.

‘Ugh! Don! This is literally an hour past midnight. Where in the world is safer than your home right now?’ I whined mentally. He continued all the way to the pier that was all the way down the big stretch of road on the edge of the city, separating land from water. He walked on the pier, and my heart started running faster than my legs were walking.

Was he going to...? No, he wasn’t...

I almost started running until he stopped just at the edge of the wooden structure. When he sat down and swished his legs at the water, I realized that the blood rushing in my ear created a noisy effect along with the rhythmic pounding of my heart painfully against my ribcage. I backtracked a little but still stayed to watch him in case he still wanted to do something stupid.

He stayed there, sulking for another hour before standing to go. I had to enter a strange alley to allow him passage without noticing me, feeling like a complete creep before I began my own journey behind him to ensure that he actually went home and not anywhere else. When he made the turn into his street, I hadn’t gotten to mine due to the gap I gave. I dragged myself into my hostel and into my room. I hit the bed and went off like a candle starved of oxygen, swearing to myself that I wouldn’t keep a night as late as this ever for reasons as trivial as this one as the darkness sucked me in. Not even the sound of Sam’s atrocious snoring could keep me awake a second longer.

***

Morning came unsurprisingly fast. Sam had to jump on me to wake me up.

“You know, if you didn’t stay awake all night in that strip club, you’d look much better this morning. Feel better, too,” she advised when I groaned from the bathroom. Of course, I had to lie about my location to her when she inquired. Medicine after death. I felt like I had a hangover. It wasn’t funny taking aspirins to numb these headaches. I was never going to stay up late following Don again. By 10, I’ll be back. No matter what. That’s how horrible I felt. My crush on him was overridden.

“One of these days, I’ll go into the club with you disguised as a man. I really want to see some hot men. There’s a lot less in the outside world,” she continued talking.

“Or you could just go to the gym,” I snarled. Why did they always never think of this?

“There’s just too much testosterone for me there.”

“And there’s none in the gym?”

Sam was my roommate. We started sharing the room shortly after we met in sociology class. She needed someone to split the rent with, and I definitely wasn’t going to give her many issues for obvious reasons, even though I was still slightly bi. Plus, I offered to pay sixty percent of the rent since ninety percent of the room was my stuff. We shared almost everything—kitchenware, shampoo, some shirts and hoodies, and even my bed. Although one or two times, we got a bit intimate and went way overboard with ourselves, nothing emotional was formed from those few scruffles.

After dressing up and having breakfast prepared by Sam, taunting her about the overcooked bacon, we got into Sam’s car—a big benefit I enjoyed with her—and sped over to the school. Saint Avenston Community College was huge. It had several buildings, almost all shaped like cathedrals, with the exception of the architecture and engineering buildings, and was always very busy, especially on mornings like this. 

This morning, however, seemed somewhat busier. And you could tell from the facial expressions of students and staff that something was wrong. Most of the college seemed to be coming from a particular direction like a crowd was just dispersing. 

Driving further, just before our department building, we noticed at least three police cars parked in front of the parking lot where the crowd seemed to have been. I could just make out four police officers forcing a person toward the cars. He was struggling, but not too much. Looking closer, I could make out blonde hair, blue eyes, tall...

Don!

I jumped out of the car before Sam hit the brakes and ran towards the scene. I was too scared to utter a word, so all I could do, with my eyes darting to and fro like a cornered prey looking for any avenue for escape, was to try and listen and make sense of what my eyes saw. Don looked horrible. His plump, perfectly shaped lower lip was split, and he had a purple cheek. His eyes showed exhaustion, and he looked at no one in particular.

“I didn’t do it!” He yelled. “I didn’t kill her. Why the hell would I...” He tried to plead. “She’s my girlfriend, bro! Why would I kill my girlfriend! Why would I kill Amelia!?”

My ears stung, and I felt dizzy for some seconds. Sam, who had already parked the car hastily, helped hold me steady. I would have fallen otherwise.

“Amelia Rosalés is dead,” I gulped as if Sam herself needed an interpretation of what was going on.