Chapter 4

Our hug lasted for a few more seconds, and after that, Lance and Mama finally arrived. They went home for a while to pack some things I needed.

This time, Mama’s already okay. I was really worried earlier because it seemed like it would be hard for her to forget about what she witnessed, but thankfully, now, she’s acting normal again.

“Mama’s already okay, right?” I wanted to make sure, so I asked Lance in a whisper as he passed by my hospital bed.

Lance simply nodded and mouthed, “Don’t worry about her. She is perfectly fine.”

After Mama had put the bags in the hospital room’s small cabinet, she immediately walked toward me and hugged me. “Are you ready for your heart transplant?” Mama rubbed my hair.

“Hmm?” I gladly nodded. I even flashed a big smile at her.

“Of course, she’s very much ready, Auntie!” Jessie also answered Mama’s question.

As Mama let go of the hug, she immediately asked why my facial reaction couldn’t be painted. Well, I really shouldn’t know how to feel because I felt like being happy would be so insensitive. As I got to receive Lianna’s heart, her life would be ended.

“Why do you look like that? Aren’t you happy?” Mama’s brows furrowed. “Or… are you nervous?”

“My emotions are all mixed up, ‘ma. I feel sad because of what happened to Lianna, but… but I also feel happy and nervous at the same time. Happy because, finally, I will be able to live a normal life once my heart is transplanted, and of course, nervous because who wouldn’t be when you’re going to undergo a major operation?” I tried to laugh just to lessen the weight of the atmosphere.

“Les, I’m sure this is what Lianna wanted. That’s probably why her parents decided to give you her heart. What you should feel right now is gratefulness towards her,” Mama explained.

“You two…” Lance interrupted our conversation as he pointed to me and Mama. He even squinted his eyes as if we were doing something punishable. “Stop being so dramatic already! We all should be happy… and I, personally, am very happy because, after this heart transplant, I will be able to shock you with my screaming and my random acts!” He laughed devilishly.

Mama then shook her head, hit him lightly on his arm, and said, “Lance… stop being so immature. Your younger sister here seems more mature than you. Grow up…” That was a bit of sarcasm, so we all ended up laughing at that remark.

I love this family so much. Of course, I consider Jessie as part of this family already. I love them so much that I already embedded in my mind that even though I had no control over the things that might happen to me while being operated on, I would live. My new heart will be transplanted successfully, and I will be able to live a normal life.

***

It was already 5 p.m. when Dr. Angel came to my room and said that the heart transplant would push through. The hospital staff then put down the little wheels of my hospital bed and pushed me onto the operating room.

Before they closed the door of the operating room, I decided to hug Mama, Lance, and Jessie. All of them whispered the same thing to me as we were all hugging, “You will live a normal life after this, Les. You will…”

As the hospital staff pushed me toward the hallway of the operating room, I saw a hospital bed, almost the same as mine, with a patient covered with a white cloth. As I got near the dead patient, that’s when I realized that it was Lianna, and she was in here because I requested Dr. Angel to let me say my ‘thank yous’ to her so that I could honor her properly before her heart becomes mine.

I thought I would be the only one who would like to see and somehow talk to her for the last time, but as I stood up and walked toward Lianna, a blonde guy who was probably the same age as me (he looked like it), removed the white cloth covering her face, and after he did, he immediately touched her face, which was full of bandages, without hesitation. He was probably Lianna’s boyfriend.

I saw a tear fall from his eyes, and as I did, I was able to examine his face… and I didn’t know why, but I felt intimidated by his looks. He looked so serious, and his eyes screamed sadness. I couldn’t deny that he was handsome too because he was fair-skinned, his hair was falling like dominoes in his ears and forehead as he was moving, his nose was well-pointed, and he even had hazelnut brown eyes which were very beautiful to look at whenever light reflected on them. From what I observed, I thought he was Filipino too because even though his hair was blonde, it was evident that his true hair color was pitch black as the roots of his hair were already showing it.

I was hoping that there would be other people who would like to see Lianna, but no other people went after him.

After the blonde guy said goodbye to Lianna, he just walked away and did not even bother to look at me.

“Hi, Lianna…” I greeted Lianna as I held her hand. “It’s sad that I won’t get to see your pretty face. Maybe… maybe someday, I will.”

And after that, I closed my eyes, prayed for her soul, and then eventually thanked her.

When I opened my eyes, I saw a glance of that blonde guy who was with Lianna earlier, so I immediately ran towards him so I could thank him too. I grabbed his hand, and then he immediately stopped walking.

“I am really sorry for your loss.” I stopped for a few seconds because I did not know what exact words I should say.

“I… I just want to tell you to… to please give my thanks to her parents. Tell them that I will forever be thankful and grateful for what they did to me… for what they gave to me.”

After that, I bowed down to him for a few seconds to pay my respects.

The next thing I knew… I was already lying unconscious in the operating room.